I am the youngest child in my family.
I’ve heard a lot of discussion around the stereotypical traits of the youngest child. In fact, many of these are so commonly echoed that they have their own name: youngest child syndrome. Sure, some of these arguably apply to me (certainly my older siblings would label me spoiled), and others do not. But, what I haven’t heard in many of these discussions is what I consider to be the biggest single advantage: life scouts. No, not like Boys Scouts of America “Life” scouts, like people scouting ahead for you in life.
The youngest child often has older siblings they have observed keenly, maintained a strong and open rapport with, and with whom they have shared significant life experiences. They know them at a profound level.
They then get to observe these older siblings blaze a variety of trails through life, years ahead of them. The youngest get to observe the decisions the older siblings make, often well aware of context, and then see the consequences of those decisions play out. Sometimes those consequences are positive, and sometimes they are not. Sometimes the outcome seems causal, and sometimes it seems that luck played a large role. Sometimes that whole decision-consequence cycle can happen well before a younger sibling might be faced with a similar decision.
In many ways, this is like mentorship on an amplified level. Not mentorship in terms of career or school advice, but mentorship in life—hard earned advice and examples in real time, with real stakes, resulting in real impact.
The advantage of having life scouts naturally follows. The youngest now has deeply detailed experience of highly trusted people to draw from when navigating the world ahead of them. As a kid, you already know the best parks or playgrounds nearby. You also know what areas of the neighborhood are dangerous. As a student, you’re confident in navigating the school system, and the trade-offs of different schedule choices. As an adult, you have gleaned some insight on dating and partner choices, and how those can affect directions in life. You have observed different fields of study or career choices, and how those areas affect stress, income, flexibility, and more. You have witnessed glimpses of different parenting styles and parenting choices. The examples are endless.
Sure, not everything directly transfers, but I’ve found these “life scouts” to be priceless in my life. A shout-out to all the older siblings out there who pave paths and building organizational knowledge for those of us who come afterward. We appreciate you!
As for me, I think benefiting from such mentorship (from siblings) is also why I value mentorship in general so highly. As the youngest sibling, I might not be able to provide powerful mentorship this particular way, but I still can hopefully pay it forward to nieces and nephews and other youth in my community.